Jonathan, Casey, Cody and the Nursery...

Jonathan likes to crawl over to the kennel and see the dogs. This is him with Casey. Lately he has been using the kennel to help pull himself up to stand. He's getting so big!

This is a picture of the nursery/guest bedroom with my super cool favorite new feature: the light blocking curtain. WHOHOO!

Here is Cody telling Jonathan how much he loves him. :)

Help! How Do You Do It?

Okay, so this is a moment to say that I'm struggling. I'm really only three weeks in to my 8 1/2 month sports season...and I'm already burned out. I feel like I'm failing in just about everything in life right now. Do you ever get so tired that you feel that way? Here are my current issues (at least the ones I'm willing to admit):

1. Struggling with balancing volleyball practices which include a jv team, a varsity team and a 10 month old who is mobile. The gym air hasn't been cooling well and they brought in a big floor fan, so I can't just let Jonathan crawl or even run around in his walker because I don't want him to lose a hand in the fan. It is very difficult to keep both teams working effectively at the level they are at and keep up with Jonathan at the same time with no other adult in the gym. I told Mr. Redmon again today that I really need an assistant. What I didn't tell him is that I'm so frustrated and discouraged with the whole process that if things don't change, you can count on this being my last year coaching. With status quo, I'm not the coach the jv team deserves, I'm not the coach the varsity team deserves, and I'm not the mommy that Jonathan deserves. I just CAN'T do it all. He told me he would ask in the meeting tomorrow if there are any volunteers who would like to come help. I'm not holding my breath.

2. Struggling with keeping up with my responsibilities at home. I admit it. I'm not the best housekeeper in the world. I tend to let things somehow always get to the point where it takes more work to clean up in a hurry if I need to. I try to stay on top of stuff - you know, the preventative cleaning where if, for example, you straighten the kitchen every evening after supper then it never gets a pileup of dishes or abstract junk that ended up getting put on the counter space. However, a few nights of coming home exhausted and "I'll take care of that later" takes over. Added on to all of this is the fact that Jonathan is loving his newfound mobileness. He can crawl all over and is starting to climb on stuff. I don't feel like I can leave him in the middle of the living room playing and go do some cleaning in another room because I'm worried about what he'll get into while I'm gone. He used to be a maniac sleeper (yes, I know I was spoiled), but this last week he has been working himself into only taking about 15-20 minute naps at a time and then screaming and kneeling in his crib with his face against the bars like a prison inmate.

3. Struggling with my weight. I don't know about you, but this is a battle I've faced since I was in 7th grade. If you look at photos yearly of my life since then, you'll see the pendulum swing. I lose the weight and feel great and then previous habits kick back in and I start putting the weight back on. I get discouraged about that, which somehow only seems to make it worse and the saga continues. Mountain Dew is a serious "comfort food" for me. For instance, I convinced myself that I needed a one liter bottle of Mountain Dew each afternoon of basketball and volleyball camp to get me through the day. Yeah. Probably not so healthy, huh? I like to joke that I haven't lost my pregnancy weight yet, but that really isn't funny since I never was pregnant. :(

I could probably go on and on with the list, but I'll leave my confessions at this point right now. So my big question is, how do YOU do it? I know I have a bunch of super moms out there as friends who will have great ideas for how I can do better. How do you multi-task? Any brilliant ideas that might help me survive volleyball season followed by basketball season? For those of you who have been there, how do you keep everything organized at home while chasing down a 10 month old and trying to protect him from as many bumps and bruises as possible? Any good ideas, other than shutting my mouth and not putting the food in, for how to work on the weight issue? Beyond all these, what Scripture do you use to encourage you and lift you up when you just feel like you are failing and you feel discouraged?

Thanks, my friends.

Stepping Up On The Soapbox To Remind...

To anyone who might come across this post - bear with me. I don't often (at least I don't think so) jump up on my soapbox, but occasionally I can't help it. Things build up in me until I release it. So, take it as my two cents and then move on. :)

Okay, if you know me or have read this blog for long, you know that my husband and I have gone through infertility and the inability to bear a child physically. So yes, I am probably a little biased on this issue.

With that history in perspective, I struggle with the assumptions and expectations out there as well as sometimes seeing what seems like people taking for granted the incredible gift of God to have babies "the natural way".

As I was in college, I watched two of my older sisters struggle with infertility. People would regularly ask, "So, when are you going to start having kids?" without realizing that they were desperately praying and trying. Long before I experienced it firsthand, I learned that this isn't a "kosher" question to ask. You don't know what is going on personally in the lives of that couple. Most often you will be better off to simply not ask the question. If you are burdened about them having a baby, pray for them. Don't ask.

By the way, since those years, one sister adopted two kids and the other miraculously had a son followed by another son followed by a daughter.

If you are privileged to have children that God has given you, recognize it as a gift. The Bible refers to children many times and includesnaming them a treasure and saying basically that blessed is the man who has his "quiver" full of them. Whether you have one child (as we do) or 8 children (as some friends of mine have) or anywhere in the middle, look at them as a blessing. Yes, I recognize that there are days of frustration and that kids can drive you crazy, but each one is a blessing and a gift. People who choose to have 52 children (okay, so exaggerating a little) and have been blessed by God with all the correct working body parts and the ability to have that many should not complain about how their lives have been drastically changed or their dreams have been cut short because of this.

I'll step back down off the soapbox with a sigh, mainly because I still regularly find myself crying at the computer when I come across blogs or comments that seem insensitive to the fact that everyone can't just schedule when and how many children they are going to have.

I love my son beyond belief. I wouldn't trade one moment with him and I'm striving to cherish each and every step of growth in his life. Would I love to have had the privilege of having him grow in my womb? Absolutely. Would I have loved to have the bonding experience of breast feeding him from birth? Definitely. Do I sometimes struggle when I'm in groups of ladies and the topic of pregnancy stories and birth stories comes up? Yep.

God is good. I'm not bitter with the situation God has placed us in. He knew that I would grow through this process. All I'm saying is please be sensitive to those around you.

Random Summer Pictures