Picture:
Yes, here indeed is the new picture. I walked past a mirror tonight and thought, "I look about 7 months along, not 13 weeks." In the end, I know that exterior size doesn't matter and it is all about the health of the babies. I've now gained 5.2 pounds since before I was pregnant.
Thoughts:
I am thankful for maternity clothes. I am thankful for some kind friends who have passed some along so I didn't have to go out and buy all new maternity clothes. I like the fact that maternity clothes make you look pregnant instead of my regular clothes which just make me look fat.
I'm not thrilled with my new doctor's office. I called them today to let them know that I'm having some cramping and to see if there is any possibility to get in (for the first time) sooner than 2 weeks from now. They said no. They weren't even really that kind about it as they shot me down. They also scheduled my first appointment for a nurse/midwife, which a friend of mine who has been there explained probably means I'm not getting a sonogram at my first appointment.
Fears:
The aforementioned cramps of today, though not extreme, did effectively scare me. That combined with the fact that I don't know how long it will take to get the next sonogram after they told me I'm high risk and would need to be monitored closely sent me nearly into a flood of tears today.
Beyond fearing what could be happening now with the babies, I have to work hard not to fear about what is to come. I admit that the whole thing is still pretty overwhelming. C-section, the probability of 3 premature babies and NICU can be scary enough, but then my mind continues on to the fact of trying to figure out how I'm going to take care of Jonathan AND three babies at the same time. I'm beyond thankful that God has answered our prayers and has given us these three precious little ones, but all the things that could go wrong combined with the question of how in the world I'm going to do this, combined with fear that I'm not awesome enough to pull off taking care of three babies at the same time can sometimes be a lot to dwell on.
What Comforts Me:
"For I know the thoughts that I think towards you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil to give you an expected end." Jeremiah 29:11
"In the multitude of my thoughts within me, Thy comforts delight my soul." Psalm 94:19
I know that God is in control. I know that there is nothing I can do to control the outcome of this pregnancy (other than the basic "Resting, drinking water and etc"). I know that He loves me and He loves the precious little ones I'm carrying. I have to be willing to trust Him if things go smoothly as well as if they don't.
My husband is an amazing support system for me. He balances me in a perfect way that could have only been planned by God. When I'm stressed, he keeps me grounded and reminds me of the things I know. As I go through my emotional ups and downs, he remains steady and loves me throughout each plummet and rise.
Knowledge that others are praying for me and for the babies also helps. Thank you to so many of you who fall in that group and who have held us up in prayer.
7 comments:
Oh Sandra... you look gorgeous by the way and I have some maternity clothes too if you need more :).
i cant even imagine your fears(i think my problem is i do imagine those fears too much )... I would be scared too... im so glad you have those verses to hold on to. I hope they truly help...
Praying for A, B, and C... Praying that i get to meet them.... praying I get to hold them... Praying that we can hang out with all 11 of our kids.... wouldn't that be great????
Sandra, I am praying for you, too! With each of my pregnancies I felt lots of cramping in the first trimester - definitely scary but normal, too. It is so hard not to let your thoughts drift to the what-ifs. (HUG)
Sandra, I am praying for you, too! With each of my pregnancies I felt lots of cramping in the first trimester - definitely scary but normal, too. It is so hard not to let your thoughts drift to the what-ifs. (HUG)
I love reading your updates, and seeing the pictures. You look great--seriously!! :) I am praying for you and those precious babies today.
I'll also be praying that things go better with your new doctor's office. The way they have been dealing with you so far isn't very impressive! It might be worth looking around to see if there is another practice anywhere near you that can handle triplets--if that is an option (not sure how all that works with the referrals and everything). Also, in regards to your first appt. with the nurse midwife--you could go ahead and request a sonogram if they don't schedule one. With your history and the fact that you are high risk, they should be more than willing to do that. I saw nurse midwives at a hospital all through my first pregnancy, and one of them ordered an ultrasound near the end just because I was measuring small and she thought my dates might be off. So it shouldn't matter who you see--dr. or m/w--they should be willing to do that for you. Just my 2 cents. :)
I'll be praying that you feel very comfortable and confident with your health care provider(s) . . . and that God will continue to give you peace through all things. Thank you for sharing from your heart!!
Look at you! So cute! And 13 weeks?!? Woohoo!!! You've got to be thrilled that you've come this far AND that morning sickness should begin fading in the next few weeks. ;o) I might have some maternity clothes for you as well. I'll have to check them out. The industry doesn't make them super durable since they aren't meant to last long, but I might have a few pieces still usable. =)
Not to dismiss your fears, but cramping can be completely normal. You're body is growing and stretching pretty rapidly, and that can cause the cramping. I'll continue praying for you, the babies, and your doctor situation.
I'm glad you are finding comfort in the Word and support from the hubby. You are indeed blessed!
So...what are Mike's feelings at the moment? Is he nervous at all? Excited? Worried? Has he gained any sympathy weight? LOL! =)
We're so excited and continue to pray for you all through this journey. God has certainly blessed you with a wonderful husband to support you....I'm grateful that I was blessed with Steve to get through each pregnancy. My oldest just loves babies and is so excited about each lady in church who's expecting. The other day she mentioned she was praying that I'd be pregnant again with multiples. Ahhhhh. What? We've got a six month old, I thought she'd be happy with her siblings, but she likes the idea of having more children like Mrs Duggar. My back can't take that. :0) We're looking forward to and counting down to D day. Praying that you'll find the right physician to care for you and those babies.
Hey it's Sarah
I hate to say this but I would insask/ demand that they see you... no OB's office should EVER dismiss what you are feeling... also even though you see a nurse/ midwife they may still do an ultrasound, I go to an office w/ 3 doctors & 5 midwives and even though I'm scheduled w/ a midwife there is also someone there to do the ultrasound separately so I would just ask.
I'm sorry there is so much fear but stand up for yourself & bully them a little if you have to! God's plan is great, just trust in him as best you can!
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